Mary Ellen – How has your relationship with your spouse or partner changed?

My husband and I have gotten closer. We had a solid marriage before Molly’s accident, thank God, and we were able to figure out pretty quickly what each other’s strengths were in this particular circumstance. I was a physician; I knew all the medical stuff that was going on. I was also the woman, so I helped Molly with all her dressing, all her personal care. I did all the day-to-day things and the contact with the physicians and most of the other, as you know it ends up being a whole community of wheelchair providers, medical supply people and everything. I ended up doing all of that. He worked a lot on getting the other resources done, getting the house ready, he worked with the school, to some extent. And he, a lot of, and this was never discussed it was a role he sort of fell into, he would take over at least emotionally when he got home. He would help, you know, cut her dinner, and make sure she, you know, had her favorite T.V. show on, he would make her laugh. I didn’t have any energy to do that, I had the energy to get done what needed to get done, but he was able to do the rest. And we work quite well together. He was also smart enough to leave me alone on days where I didn’t get out of bed, and instead of saying, “what did you do all day,” he kept his mouth shut for a very long time. And he must have realized on some level that I needed that time to get myself back together.